I know you troopers have stuck by me through the tough times - trust me, I haven't forgotten the Belgian Jumpstyle onslaught of a few years back, or the Tecktonick foray we recently made it through. But dammit it, soldiers, I think we may have met our Waterloo or some other relevant military metaphor (I don't know much about that stuff, to be honest).
This site has never been shy of reporting on dangerous Western European dance styles, but it might be time to call it a day. I've met my match. I don't know if it's going to be harder going on or just turning back. Here's what we're dealing with:
I look back on the pleasantly lame days of Tecktonick with autumnal-hued affection now. I can even find a place for the childishly enthusiastic jump. But I never thought I'd happen upon a style of dance that honestly, and unironically, looks like you are dancing on hot coals while suffering explosive diarrhea. Mine has clearly been a sheltered life.
The distinction between Hakken and, um, rapidly walking on the spot is unclear.
But it has left me unhinged.
I have some good things to write about at the moment, but I really don't want to sully the affair by including them in this post. I'm so very, very sorry.